Today I also attend the funeral and mourn the passing of a good friend who died at the age of 37. Just a few years older than I am right now.
I really hate it when people tell me things like "Everything happens for a reason". I think that's one of the worst things you can tell the grieving, mostly because it's a crock of shit. Whoever said that there has to be a reason for everything was lying. Sometimes truly horrible things happen to really good people, while other people are pure evil and continue to live and spread their hate.
So please think about what you say to those who have lost a loved one or had a tragedy befall them. Instead of spouting some nonsensical words, tell them something from your heart. Share a memory of the deceased or tell them that you don't know what to say but you are thinking of them. Bring them food, or just sit and listen to them and be a friend, or put on your work boots and help them in a tangible way.
"Personally, I've never been a big believe in karma. When the distraught woman on the evening news thanks God for saving her, her family, and her home from the terrible tornado, I always wonder about the family next door who lost everything. So was God, like, really pissed of at them? The whole what-goes-around-comes-around thing is simply our way of trying to make sense of things that make no sense. Great stuff happens to bad people. Bad shit happens to good people. This is just the way it is."
-"How to teach filthy rich girls" by Zoey Dean
"Most of the time I don't believe in God, though I'm fascinated by the idea of intelligent design. Because if what we see all around us are the fruits of God's college sketch pad, what designs did this guy have that weren't worth saving? If degenerative illness, mommies who eat their young, religious wars, and homeless children all made it past the rough outline stage, wasn't it possible that we, by offering unequivocal gratitude and thanks, instead of constructive criticism, were simply helping reinforce all his worst instincts? Weren't we what AA would call his "enablers"?"
-"Nose down, eyes up" by Merrill Markoe
No comments:
Post a Comment